Sunday, August 28, 2005

The Sinner's Prayer

The Sinner's Prayer
Try me, O God, and search the ground of my heart: prove me and examine my thoughts. Look well if there be any wickedness in me, any root of bitterness yet undiscovered; and lead me in the way everlasting. Show me the true state of my soul. Bring me out from every false refuge. Strip off every deceitful covering, every covering that is not of Thy Spirit. Forbid that the anchor of my hope should be cast, or the house of my dependence built, on any but Christ, the Rock of Ages. Forbid that I should rest short of that repentance which is Thy gift, and is connected with life eternal: and forbid, O forbid, that I should sit down without aspiring to that conformity unto Thee in righteousness and true holiness, abstracted from which repentance is false and faith is dead.

- Augustus Toplady

Saturday, August 27, 2005

Hard Negotiations...

Moses Negotiates the CommandmentsThe Hebrew people were sitting around Mt. Sinai. You could hear only a subdued murmur among them, but you could feel the tension in the air.For hours now, Moses had been on top of the mountain, hidden from their gaze by clouds wafting around its top. Sometimes the clouds became dark and you could hear thunder rolling down. In spite of the warm weather, this caused a shudder among the waiting mass.The end of day was approaching and dusk was beginning to set in when suddenly a figure came through the clouds and walked down the steep mountainside carrying a heavy load. It was Moses.Moses set down his load and raised his hands."Friends," he said. "Friends, it was hard work and I have done my best. I have negotiated with Him. I used every possible argument, every trick I could think of—and I think I was successful. The good news is: I brought him down from 15 to 10. The bad news is: Adultery is still in."

Thursday, August 11, 2005

The Nuns Enter Heaven

(Let's chuckle a little).


Three nuns died and visited St. Peter at the pearly gates. St. Peter said he would admit them if they each answer one question.

He turned to the first nun and asked, "Who was the first man?"

"Adam," the nun confidently replied. The trumpets sounded and the angels sang as the gates swung open and she walked into heaven.

St. Peter turned to the second nun. "Who was the first woman?""Eve," she replied. The trumpets sounded and the angels sang.

Then St. Peter turned to the last nun. "What was the first thing Eve said to Adam?"

The nun paused for a moment. "Gee, that's a hard one!"

The trumpets sounded and the angels sang.

Spouse's Prayer

Lord Jesus,
grant that I and my spouse may have a true
and understanding love for each other.
Grant that we may both
be filled with faith and trust.
Give us the grace to live
with each other in peace and harmony.
May we always bear with one another's weaknesses
and grow from each other's strengths.
help us to forgive one another's failings
and grant us patience, kindness, cheerfulness
and the spirit of placing the well-being
of one another ahead of self.

May the love that brought us together
grow and mature with each passing year.
Bring us both ever closer to You
through our love for each other.
Let our love grow to perfection.